Where do I start!!? There have been ups, lows and all those in between!! I never knew it was possible to have such a range of emotions all in one day!! Nor did I know I could be so physically and emotionally exhausted!!
Our first week (at home, we won’t go into the first few days spent in hospital!) as expected, was all one big learning curve. If I am honest, the week was filled with visitors and the whole week just merged into one!! I remember the first night at home with Spencer was so scary but so exciting!! Although I was absolutely shattered I just had to keep checking on him every few minutes!!! (This novelty soon wore off and tiredness sunk in!).
Weeks 2-4: These few weeks were of course difficult but what do you expect with a newborn! It was going as well as I would have hoped. My partner was off for paternity leave so we shared the feeds, nappies, baths, gave eachother nap times! To be honest, my partner took a little more duties than me as I was still recovering from the c-section! It was going well. Spencer was a dream basically just waking up for a feed or nappy change then going back to sleep in his basket. We still had lots of visitors too. We even braved a few trips out other than just the dog walk. We went out for coffee/lunch even a bit of shopping.
Weeks 4-7: Where did my baby go!!? Please let me have him back!! My partner went back to work and during these weeks Spencer become very unsettled. I am still not sure what the cause was for this. He would just cry and cry and cry all hours of the day for no obvious reason. Due to this he then became overtired and it just got worse and worse!! Gone were the feed or nappy change then back to sleep days. After a chat with the health visitor and a trip to the GP we were offered all kinds of advice. We changed Spencer’s milk firstly from normal Aptamil to the Comfort version as the problems seemed to be digestive related. Then we were advised to try anti reflux milk instead, then gaviscon, then colief drops and then I just got so so desperate I ended up taking Spencer to a cranial oesteopath after reading such good things about them!!
I know you often hear people say “don’t wish your time away, they grow up so fast” but these few weeks I really did just want them over! As bad as it sounds, it was horrible. It took away everything I ever expected of motherhood! I always had these visions of starting maternity leave, being home with baby and being all domesticated!! I thought, the house will be spotless, I can cook lots of yummy meals even catch up with some tv!! The reality.. The house is a messy tip!! (As am I!!) Iv missed meals let alone cooked meals! I have never eaten so many takeaways!! I have had days where I haven’t even been able to shower where Spencer refuses to be put down! Spencer ended up co-sleeping with me just so not only me but Spencer could actually get some sleep. (A habit I sooo wish I didn’t fall into and something I said from day 1 I wouldn’t do!!) Quite honestly, I was starting to go insane thinking is this really what my life has become!? I found myself always thinking of my life before Spencer and some days how I just wanted that back!! Luckily, I have amazing friends and family around me all who would take Spencer for a few hours (even a night) and just come round even just to sit with Spencer while I ate!! Thankfully, these bad weeks didn’t last forever and things started to miraculously get better.. I’m not sure if it was the new milk, the colief or the cranial guy and who cares! Something worked!! Woooo!
Week 7-8: What a week! I have enjoyed NEARLY every minute of motherhood this week. I have got into a routine of waking up and putting Spencer down in his swing chair (and he doesn’t cry!) while I get up, wash and sterilise bottles for the day, feed the dog, actually have a shower, wash my teeth and get myself ready for the day ahead AND eat some breakfast! I can then get Spencer washed and ready for the day happily and we often go for a morning walk. We have had some nice days out with friends and Spencer even experienced his first softplay play date!! Our only hump in the road this week was Spencer’s 8 week injections! As expected, he was a little grouchy for 24 hours afterwards but nothing a bit of calpol and lots of cuddles can’t solve!! Now I have my happy content baby back my target for the next few weeks is to get Spencer out of the habit of co-sleeping!.. Any advice welcome please ladies!!
I am sure, we will still have more humps in the road but we will also have some amazing happy days too! There is no right or wrong being a Mummy and I think the entire journey will be one big learning curve! A learning curve I can’t wait to experience!! I will be taking each day as it comes.. Bring on the next 8 weeks!!!